Marie Irwin (nee Heffernan) passed away on April 27, 2023, a few weeks shy of her 95th birthday.  She died peacefully in her apartment on Greystone Avenue in Riverdale, where she had resided since her teenage years. Marie was the only child of Francis and Lillian Heffernan, and came of age during the tumultuous days of the depression and World War II.  Her father was a devout Irish Catholic and her mother the daughter of Jewish immigrants from Austria.

As a young woman, Marie began pursuing what would become lifetime passions– travel, reading, theater, cinema, popular music, and taking in all of the culture New York had to offer.  She initially attended Marymount College and subsequently transferred and graduated with a degree in Psychology from Barnard College. In the early 1950’s she met and ultimately married Bill Irwin, an All-American champion swimmer at Rutgers by way of Brooklyn.  She had two sons, Billy and Eddie, whose happiness and well-being became her life’s work and whose accomplishments and families brought her great pride and joy. Marie and Bill separated and eventually divorced, and her loving and generous parents helped with the kids as she began full-time secretarial work  at Fieldston School.

After getting advice from one of the nuns at St. Gabriel’s School that the boys should consider a more academically challenging school, she managed to get both boys admitted to Horace Mann School,  secured scholarship funds for them, and then made the life changing move of taking a job at Horace Mann’s Lower School as its principal’s executive assistant. While, in the short term, this allowed her to take advantage of faculty tuition discounts for the boys, in the long term she made lifelong friendships with many colleagues and even found the time to befriend Tara Casey, a first grade teacher and the future mother of three of her grandchildren. Marie ended up working at Horace Mann for 30 years, mentoring younger colleagues, running a tight ship, and providing a formidable first line of defense for the principal vs difficult parents or recalcitrant teachers.

Throughout the 80’s and 90’s she took advantage of the school calendar by taking overseas trips nearly every summer, usually to exotic place with church groups organized by her close friend and confidant, Father James Griffen.  After Bill and  Debby purchased a house on Martha’s Vineyard, that became her favorite destination, and she spent many happy vacations there with family and friends.

After retiring from Horace Mann, she worked part time for a local Riverdale optometrist and settled into her favorite role as “Grandma Ree”  a nickname she had decided her grandchildren would call before any of them were even born.  A willing baby sitter and later a fixture at every game, school play, or concert she could find, she was a constant presence and positive influence on her five grandkids,  Katie, Chris, Eric, Robbie and Charlotte.  She loved to spend time with them and they in turn loved their quirky and opinionated Grandma Ree.  They will be swapping stories about her for the rest of their lives.

Though an only child, Marie had close relationships with her cousins, and was a loyal and lifetime friend to many people from all phases of her life.  For friends and family she was someone you could always count on in good times or bad.  She wasn’t always the easiest person to get along with, and didn’t try to be. She would make her feelings known and live with the consequences.  But she had a soft heart and an open mind, and served as a great role model for all of us.

In the last few years as her health declined and she became increasingly dependent on her family, a funny thing happened.  We stopped taking her for granted and began putting her needs first. We spent more quality time with her and came to better appreciate her wisdom and sense of humor.  We were fortunate to find three wonderful dedicated women to take care or her around the clock.  The family would like to acknowledge and thank Georgia Harris, Avis Clough and especially Sandra Jones for everything they did for us to improve Marie’s quality of life and provide peace of mind to the family day after day through some challenging  times.

It was nice during these final years to hear people constantly tell Marie how lucky she was to have her family taking such good care of her.  But in our heart of hearts, we knew they had it backwards – we were the lucky ones.

A wake will be held at Riverdale-on-Hudson Funeral Home, located at 6110 Riverdale Ave Bronx, NY from 2 to 6 pm on Tuesday, May 2, 2023. Marie’s life will be celebrated at a Mass of Christian Burial on Wednesday, May 3, 2023 at 9:45 am at St. Margaret of Cortona Church. Interment Gate of Heaven Cemetery, Hawthorne NY.